2016 Goals: No Accountability?
The Champagne corks have all popped, the horns have been blown and the New Year’s Eve hangover (real or metaphorical) is gone. It’s January 2nd, and new year’s resolutions are in full swing for many people. The gym parking lot is packed, grocery stores are selling more fresh produce than usual and Facebook is filled with motivational memes about how you can do it.
One piece of advice commonly given when making “resolutions” (I prefer setting goals – you can make or change them whenever you need to without having to wait until January 1st!) is to get an accountability partner. Someone who will follow up with you to make sure you’re doing what you said you were going to do. Someone, basically, to guilt you into working toward your goals.
Now, I have no problems with telling people about your goals. Having a cheering section is important! But the idea that you need a babysitter seems to run contrary to what a goal is. When you set a goal, it’s supposed to be something you want. Something you love.
I don’t need an accountability partner to keep me faithful to my husband, or to make sure I feed my son and change his diaper. I love them, and it’s not difficult to make my “goals” of maintaining our relationships on a daily basis. If you are “in love” with your goal, do you really need someone asking you on a weekly basis if you are working toward it?
If you’re aren’t in love with your goal…ask yourself why it’s your goal. You may find that you made it a goal because of the expectations of others or because you think it’s something you’re supposed to do. If that’s the case, you will likely fail no matter how many accountability partners you have, because you don’t really want it in your heart.
Or maybe you made a goal but you don’t have the paradigm to support it. Throngs of people make a goal in the new year to “get healthy” or reach their goal weight. But as they get started, they are thinking about failures in the past and those shortcomings are encroaching on their positive thinking with each passing day until ultimately failure is what they expect. Telling people may delay this result, but in the end if you are thinking about lack of success, that is what will be delivered to you.
Other times when a goal is made people deep down don’t really believe they deserve it or that they can do it. When they try to visualize their success, all they see is lies. This requires a serious self-review. If you are struggling with low self-worth, self-confidence or even figuring out who you are, this is not something I can cover in a single blog post. However, I recommend reviewing some of my past posts that you may find helpful:
Getting rid of your accountability partner may be heresy to many goal-oriented individuals. If this is really working for you, then by all means account away! But first make sure that your goals are really yours and you love them. That will put you on the road to success.
Here’s wishing a First Class New Year to all my readers. May your year be filled with all your best hopes and dreams coming into your reality. Make 2016 exceptionally yours!